THE GOOD, THE BAD, THE UGLY & THE DOGS! (Or, PLAN C FROM OUTER SPACE)

[*Note 'N' Stuffs: This blog bit was inspired by a comment-versation I've been having with Brother Charles... 

Carl... 

Carter... 

Carlton... 

Camden... 

Casey... 

Carson... 

Cyrus... CYRUS?!?!?!  

Well,... let's just call him C. M. Cardinale, whose blog > 'The Unexpected World' y'otta check out. I'm-a dedicate this blog bit to him because he seems like a really nice guy and because it costs me nothing to do so. 😉] 

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C.M. Cardinale and I are muy big movie fans, and I recently attempted to show him a photo of my DVD collection - twice - but, the Internet being what it izn't, he wazn't able to view the photo. So, I told him that I had a Plan C, and this blog bit is that third (and final) Plan. 

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And I figgered that if I'm going to post a photo of 98% of my DVD collection on this blog, I oughta at least attempt to make it amusing, or entertaining, or... one of those words that end with ing. This stuffs below is my attempt to rise to the ing level. 

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Here is (most) of the DVD collection of a multi-faceted, anti-normie weirdo -- the good, the bad, the ugly & the dogs:

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Oops! Sorry. That was a photo of where Edwin's dog pissed on the side of my house. (Shirley you can understand how I'd make a mistake like that, right?)

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TAKE TWO: 

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[Click on the image to make it look a wee bit more impressive.]

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To see that image even bigger & clearer, click HERE.

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What you see there is stuffs from [link> 'AIRPLANE!' to 'ZEITGEIST DESTROYED: Shattering The Myth That Christianity Is Based Upon Ancient Astrology' (to partially quote Robert Barone: "Good luck to you" trying to find that DVD in 2026!) 

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Let's explore a small smackerel of the stuffs found in-between the A & Z, eh? Let's do it category by category.

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THE GOOD: 

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Well, what I think is good and what your mother-in-law thinks is good are protly different things. So, just to be fair, I'll toss in movies (in no particular order) that appeal to maverick me, and some that also appeal to the masses. (Helck, even the masses get it right from time to time.) 

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Tom Sawyer (the 1973 musical starring Johnny Whitaker & War And Peace Warren Oates). 

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[Two thumbs up!]

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And... Tortilla Flat (A+. This one has everything: wine, women, song, dogs, miracles, the Wizard of Oz, & my Ma's highest recommendation!); East Of Eden (1954); It's A Wonderful Life; Dead Poets Society; Harvey; His Girl Friday; Roman Holiday; Casablanca; American Graffiti; Sunset Boulevard; Field Of Dreams; The Man Who Would Be King; My Fair Lady; Life Is Beautiful; The Sting; On The Waterfront; The Sound Of Music (except I hate that nun's song!); Singin' In The Rain; The Wizard Of Oz; The Thin Man (the entire series - all six pictures); and, naturally, One Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.

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THE BAD:  
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OK, pay attention, because understanding this category can be a bit tricky. By "BAD" I do NOT mean "bad". What I mean is that these movies might seem to be bad based upon their titles, reputations and/or misunderstood themes. These "bad" movies are all good (some are really good) in my unimpeachable opinion, and I thinks y'all should see them before the world comes to an end, or before 2029 - whichever comes first. 

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The Devil And Miss Jones (But no, but no, but NO! - it's NOT a porno movie! The porno movie - 'The Devil IN Miss Jones' - slightly modified its title and stole its thunder... so to speak. But the original classic starring Jean Arthur, Charles Coburn, and the *real* Santa Claus, whose real name is Edmund Gwenn, is perhaps my #1 all-time favorite 'Screwball Comedy')... 

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Altered States; On Borrowed Time; My Bodyguard; The Life And Times Of Judge Roy Bean; Dead Again; The Shootist (John Wayne's best performance!); Better Off Dead; Dr. Strangelove (unquestionably the high-water mark of 'black comedy'); The Wild Bunch (it's not my favorite Western, but it's probably the greatest); Blazing Saddles; One From The Heart; Crossroads ("Forty dollars ain't nothin' to sneeze at!" & "Muddy Waters invented electricity!"); Birdy; Born Yesterday; Mary Poppins (1964); and Song Of The South (which is my #1 favorite animated movie!) 

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Also, Ferris Bueller's Day Off (primarily because my Sister appeared in it)... 

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[That's my sister, Bonehead, giving the teacher the "stink-eye" in 'Ferris Bueller's Day Off'.]

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I would be remiss in failing to mention the first film in the great time-travel trilogy, Back To The Future, which my brother appeared in...

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[That's my brother, Nappy, standing & smiling just to the right of Michael J. Fox -- i.e, he's the dude on the left-ist side of the screen... despite the fact that there's nothing even slightly "leftist" about my brother, and if you say anything to the contrary, he will knock your block off and mail it to Bruce Springsteen c/o San Francisco!]

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THE UGLY:  

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What I mean by "ugly" is... these are some of my favorites that most folks would categorize as "Guilty Pleasures". In other words, they're not cinematic masterpieces - and in most cases, they are very low budget movies - but, nevertheless, I really enjoy watching them. I can honestly say that I get as much (if not more) pleasure from watching some of my "Guilty Pleasures" as I do from viewing some of my favorite A-List films. 

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Hollywood Or Bust, released in 1956 was the final Dean Martin & Jerry Lewis collaboration, and not only is it my very favorite "Guilty Pleasure" movie, it's actually one of my Top 10 favorite movies of all time, period. How come that? I could easily write a full-length blog bit 'splaining the 101.5 reasons Hollywood Or Bust (HOB) appeals to me so much. Various places, people and things in this movie remind me of many details related to my youth, so it's like a Waybac Machine trip to Happyland for me.

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In a recent comment to me, C.M. Cardinale wrote, "Thanks for taking my mind off the world for a bit!", and that is precisely what HOB does for me! It's my ultimate escapist picture, and it's safer & healthier than drugs. Whenever this dirty, rotten, stinkin' world starts to bum me out, I immediately reach for HOB. (I've only watched it 25 times in the last five years.) 

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Some other favorite "Guilty Pleasure" movies for me are... 

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The Spirit Of '76 (if you were a groovy dude or chick during this country's Bicentennial celebration, you really gotta see this crazy, stupid and funny trip back in time to "the most embarrassing decade in history"); Hollywood Shuffle (This shit could really happen!); I'm Gonna Git You Sucka; A Mighty Wind (the same cast and almost as funny as 'This Is Spinal Tap'); Heldorado & Under California Stars. Those last two movies give us Roy Rogers, along with Dale Evans, Trigger & Gabby Hayes. I grew up watching Roy & I love him still; he's a cherished part of my childhood, and those are my two favorite R.R. movies. The first one is seriously funny; the second one is so bad, in a very cheesily endearing way, that it's funny, too. Roy Rogers called the villain a "no-good guy", which is probably the nastiest thing he ever said to anyone. Guffaw-Out-Loud! 

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THE DOGS:  

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OK, these are those which are just so gosh-dern bad in every possible way that they're kind of fascinating. You know, like the proverbial circus train wreck that you just can't help looking at and being ashamedly amused by the sight of the lions eating the dead clowns and the elephants playing with their peanuts.

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Plan 9 From Outer Space & Glen Or Glenda? Well, truthfully, you could include just about every movie made by Ed Wood. I actually own the pink faux-angora Ed Wood boxed set, which was a gift from my dear ol' Ma! She knew and accepted how *different* I always was. (I don't mean "different" in the Liberace & Elton John way. I don't play piano, I don't tickle them ivories, and I "don't mess around with Jim".) 

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FUN FACT: I actually met Vampira (Maila Nurmi) once at a small, exclusive gathering of James Dean fans at Kenneth Kendall's house in 1988, after his bust of Dean had been unveiled & dedicated at the Griffith Park Observatory in helL.A. 

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The Room -- This one was a gift from my friend Julio Seis-Abeja. Taking ALL of the elements of filmmaking into consideration, this certainly has to be one of the worst movies ever made. Even so, I don't *hate* it, like I do some others I've seen which were technically better made. It's almost comically atrocious.

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THE GOOD, THE BAD & THE UGLY:  

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I own only one movie that falls under all three of those categories, and that movie is... 

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The Good, The Bad & The Ugly 

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If you didn't see that coming... well... you just might like 'The Room'. 

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BONUS MATERIAL: 

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I own a number of movies that I really dig 'n' like 'n' love which have been largely forgotten in the 21st Century, and I want to recommend some of them to you now.

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Koyaanisqatsi - This was my #1 all-time favorite movie for 39 years. Today, I have it at only a measly #2. You can see it for free at ScrewYouTube. This one literally changed the way I saw the world.

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Did I mention that the Western is my favorite film genre? Well, it is. And Ruggles Of Red Gap is a 1935 Western comedy that no one seems to know today, but it's a silly hoot! It stars Charles Laughton and the hilarious Roland Young. 

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Speaking of Westerns, Rustlers' Rhapsody was written and directed by Hugh Wilson (the same man who gave us WKRP In Cincinnati) and I think it may be the most underrated / forgotten comedy today. It stars Tom Berenger & Andy Griffith and has a unique & humorous musical soundtrack. The problem is, the viewer likely needs to have a fairly decent understanding of the history of the Western movie genre in order to really understand all of the inside jokes. To me, the "*confident* heterosexual" scene is off-the-charts hilarious!!

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I know you don't believe what I'm saying, because I can hear your snorting. Don't believe me? Then click HERE and watch the scene where Blackie learns that he was "out of order".

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Then again, Defending Your Life may be the most underrated / forgotten comedy today. It's a story about what happens to people after they die, therefore it probably qualifies as a 'black comedy'. It stars Albert Brooks & Meryl Streep, but Rip Torn as a conniving Defense Attorney absolutely steals the show! What a hysterically funny lost gem of a movie. 

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I am shocked - SHOCKED! - to know how many people are unfamiliar with 1970's Scrooge, starring Albert Finney. Yes, we all know the story, but you don't know it the way it is told in this marvelous musical! It is funny, quirky, and beautiful. And it's my #1 favorite Christmas movie. (Sorry about that, George Bailey.) And as my Xma$ gift to you, I'm allowing you to watch if for free right > here.

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For about two decades I have had a couple of 'daily reminder' quotes from Scrooge taped to the back of my bedroom door:

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Speaking of shockingly unknown free movies, I must mention The Woman In The Window. It's a very obscure Film Noir directed by Fritz Lang, in which Edward G. Robinson gives what I think is probably his best performance. It starts out light 'n' easy but then the noose starts tightening, the walls start closing in, and the desperate claustrophobia becomes palpable to the viewer! And then... and then... well, that's all I'm gonna tell ya. But youz guys 'n' gals can watch it for free > here. 

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Waking Ned Devine is a thoroughly C&D movie (charming & delightful) about Irish people and a dead man's winning lottery ticket. There is a classic 'black comedy' scene toward the end which is hysterically funny and literally unforgettable! 

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When my dental hygienist learned that I really liked & owned Somewhere In Time, she could scarcely believe it. It was one of her two all-time favorite movies, and she said she'd never before met a man who had even heard of it (...therefore, I suspected that she had immediately fallen in love with me, forcing me to find a new dental joint).

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Somewhere In Time combines Romance & Time-Travel giving us a fantastic story about timeless love. Unfortunately, there are some plot holes so large that an entire fleet of Waste Management garbage trucks could be driven through them side-by-side! I simply pretend that I don't see those holes and somehow manage to enjoy the movie regardless. 

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My good friend Nitro Wilbury Babskiddo (now residing in Heaven) made me aware of The Big Short. Of the limited number of movies I've seen which were released in the 21st Century, this is the only one I consider to be an outright masterpiece of filmmaking. (Well, perhaps 'Slumdog Millionaire' also.) If you want to understand what happened to the economy in 2008 - and which will soon happen again, only much worse - you need to see this one! It's simultaneously entertaining & educational. 

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Let's go West, young man (and you cowgirls, too)... The Westerner (1940) stars Gary Cooper, and one of my very favorite character actors, Walter Brennan,  who plays Judge Roy Bean. This laconic dramedy lopes along in a relaxed way right up to the pert-near shocking finish. I would describe this movie as the anti-'Tombstone' Western - it's about 180-degrees different from that famous Kurt Russell / Val Kilmer oater, but you must see it anyway. "That's it. That's muh rulin'!" 

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I stated above that I think 'The Wild Bunch' is the greatest Western, but it's not my favorite. That honor goes to the mostly unknown Monte Walsh (1970). This movie inspired me to give my "Countess" her nickname. (The "Countess" made me aware of several films that are still amongst my most beloved today.) I believe that the review I wrote for Monte Walsh was one of my ten best, and you can find it here > Dead Men Riding. 

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Another review you might wish to read is 

> Why 'The Wild Bunch' Is A Cinematic Masterpiece. 

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Unquestionably, the greatest TV Western series ever made was Alias Smith And Jones. (Don't even mention Bonanza, Gunsmoke and Maverick or I'll fill ya full of lead!) Kinda-sorta loosely based on Butch & Sundance, Smith & Jones (not their *real* names), notorious bank and train robbers, are attempting to go straight in order to gain a pardon from the governor. Sounds simple enough, right? What they discover is that trying to abide by the law is more difficult than robbing banks and trains ever were. 

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Alias Smith And Jones had it all: terrific characters, great charisma, and E-Ticket writing with complex storylines, lots of humor and some utterly fantastic plot twists! This is one of my very favorite TV shows of all time. Very sadly, after 33 episodes, actor Pete Duel (a.k.a. Hannibal Heyes / Joshua Smith) committed suicide, and although the show went on, it wasn't worth watching anymore. (Kinda like trying to watch 'The Andy Griffith Show' after it switched from black & white to color.) 

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How about DOCUMENTARIES? Do I like 'em? You bet yer mama's favorite slippers I do! Let's start with the most surprising documentary that I really dig: 

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Mad Hot Ballroom (2005) -- Tough guys don't dance... and neither do I - "not a lick" (to quote Thelma Lou). I've got all the rhythm of Deputy Dawg falling into the creek mud! Sometimes I even have trouble stumbling properly after a night out on the town with Nick Charles. 

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BUT!... I love Mad Hot Ballroom. How come that? Well, it's funny & wonderful, but the DVD box explains it better'n I could: 

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6,000 Kids, 60 Schools, 

10 Weeks, 1 Dream! 

Mad Hot Ballroom is the award-winning film that follows New York City fourth and fifth graders as they journey into the world of competitive ballroom dance. Told from their candid and hilarious perspectives, they learn that dance is not just about a few steps - it's about life. ... typical urban kids merengue, tango, rumba and literally transform themselves into "ladies and gentlemen" as they prepare for the highly anticipated, final citywide competition. 

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Back when I was a wanna-be actor, my role model was James Dean. How come that? Well... helck, ain't you seen any of his movies?!?! I thought he was the best, most inventive actor ever. And I still do! There have been a lot of documentaries made about Dean but my favorite goes all the way back to 1975 with JAMES DEAN: The First American Teenager. It is highly entertaining and features interviews with Sammy Davis Jr., Natalie Wood, Dennis Hopper & the aforementioned Kenneth Kendall (at whose house I met Vampira from 'Plan 9 From Outer Space'). The soundtrack includes Rock gems by The Eagles, David Bowie and Elton John (who plays the piano, who tickles them ivories, and who messes around "with Jim" 😉). .

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Seriously, this is a documentary that does justice to Dean's remarkable, God-given talent.

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{*Special shout-out to my dear, Dear, DEAR friend the ~Flyin' Aardvark~, who bought this documentary for me, and a good number of the other DVDs in my collection.*}

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Below is the opening few minutes of JAMES DEAN: The First American Teenager, and Kenneth Kendall is the guy who makes the comment about how living movie stars seem to be only capable of disappointing their fans: 

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The Singing Revolution is another movie that Nitro Wilbury Babskiddo (better known online as FarAwayEyes or FAE) turned me on to. It's a very spiritually inspiring story described like this: 

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"Estonia's coveted position between Europe and Russia has lured wave after wave of occupiers. The nation's darkest chapter dawned in 1939 with the arrival of the Soviets. It seemed this time that the Estonian nation might vanish completely; yet the Estonians waited, and fought, and sang - and ultimately survived."

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The New York Times (who usually suck worse than a death-rattling soldier dying in Korea) said: 

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"Imagine the scene in Casablanca in which the French patrons sing 'La Marseillaise' ... and you've only begun to imagine the force of The Singing Revolution." 

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The Discovery Of Noah's Ark (from Reality Zone / American Media can be found > here). Back in my early twenties, when I was an uninformed, self-assured know-it-all (in other words, back when I was just like everyone else in their early twenties), I disbelieved The Bible primarily because of the obvious fairy-tale about Noah's Ark.

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It's a long, miraculous story but... at the age of 34, I became a (Maverick) Christian, without even considering the "impossibility" of the "silly" Noah's Ark legend. Over the following years, I was shamefacedly enlightened regarding a whole lotta things that I had been ignorant about, including Noah's Ark. 

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Today, I believe in Noah's Ark and the other "impossible" stories in The Holy Bible to the exact same degree that I disbelieve the stories about American astronots driving a dune buggy on the Moon and human beings having evolved from pond scum in San Francisco a godzilla-ion years ago... or in the 'Summer of Love', whichever came first. 

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Let us not forget  Idiocracy , the outlandish comedy that time and satan transformed into a documentary about the United States. President Camacho... President Trump... To quote from Cheech y Chong: "It's all the same thing, man." 

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Dear Readers, I thank you for your attention to this matter.

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TTFN and WP&Z! 

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~ Stephen T. McCarthy

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Blog Bit Made In Willoughberry, U.S.A.